


Reflection in the Mirror

by Thursdays_Angel



Series: Being Human [6]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Depressed Castiel, Fluff and Angst, Helpful Dean, M/M, Mentions of True Form
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-23
Updated: 2014-07-23
Packaged: 2018-02-10 04:14:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2010555
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thursdays_Angel/pseuds/Thursdays_Angel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel feels like he's of no use. Dean finds something he can help with. This leads to Castiel giving him a glimpse of his true form.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Reflection in the Mirror

            It had been a couple of days since Dean had taken Castiel out to drive. Cass still had a slight bump and a little bit of bruising but all in all he was healing quite well, physically anyway.

            After finally convincing the angel that he _had_ to sleep Cass had been doing that like it was going out of style. Dean tried not to show it, really he did, but he was concerned for the nerdy angel. Cass just seemed to get more depressed as the days went by.

            Dean walked out on to Bobby’s back porch and found the angel sitting on the steps, trench coat wrapped around him. That thing was like a security blanket. Dean had no room to tease though, he’d done the same thing with his dad’s leather jacket.

            He sat beside Cass, following the angel’s gaze out into the salvage yard. Dean couldn’t see anything that could possibly hold the angel’s attention. At least not with the intensity he appeared to be giving whatever he was starting at. “How are you doing?” he asked tentatively.

            “I’m fine,” Castiel replied.

            Dean snorted, not believing him for a second. “If you’re fine then why are you acting like Mr. McMopey?”

            Castiel turned to face Dean, confusion reflecting in his eyes. “Who?”

            Dean rolled his eyes, “Never mind. I was just wondering why you’ve been so depressed.”

            “I am not depressed.”

            “Yeah, sure and I shit rainbows out my ass.”

            Castiel looked even more confused than before. “That is not possible Dean.”

            “I know Cass, I was being sarcastic.”

            Castiel turned his head away, gaze returning to what he had been staring at before. They fell into silence. Dean hated touchy-feely chick-flick moments but something was telling him not to let the angel stay depressed. Besides, every instinct he had fought against the thought. Dean hated seeing anyone he loved depressed and hurting.

            Love?

            Dean… could live with that. Cass had quickly wormed his way into Dean’s heart, helping to fill the gaping hole there.

            “Does this have to do with what happened the other day? You feeling useless and like a burden?”

            Castiel’s shoulders tensed, giving Dean his answer.

            “Cass…”

            The angel turned his gaze to Dean. Blue eyes bored into green. “I need to do something. There must be something I can do.”

            Dean knew how Cass felt in the idea of not being able to do anything. There were times when he had been too injured to help his dad on hunts. Drove him crazy knowing he couldn’t do anything. He hated that Castiel felt that way.

            Suddenly an idea came to him. It wouldn’t be anything that could hurt the angel turned human and would probably keep him occupied for a long time. “I know what you can do.”

            Castiel looked intrigued, “What?”

            “Well there is that huge tome Bobby’s got that’s written completely in Enochian. How about you translate it?”

            The angel’s mood seemed to brighten, “Yes, I could do that. It will take some time though.”

            “Perfect, you’ll be able to keep busy. We can run to the store and get everything you’re going to need.” Dean clapped Castiel on the shoulder. “See Cass, you’re not useless.” Dean only hoped the angel agreed.

* * *

            After a trip to the store Dean brought back several blank notebooks, pens, pencils and colored pencils. He laid his purchases out for Castiel to inspect. “I wasn’t sure what exactly you were going to want or need so I got a little of everything.”

            Castiel gathered up the supplies along with the tome. He hadn’t gone with Dean only because he wanted to start looking through the book to see what was in there.

            “It will take some time to translate,” Castiel told him again.

            “No problem,” Dean said. “You told me you wanted something to keep you occupied for a while. Knock yourself out.”

            Castiel tilted his head to the side. “Why would I do that?”

            “Huh?”

            “Knock myself out?”

            “Oh,” Dean ran a hand over his face. “Dude it’s just a saying. I didn’t mean for you to actually knock yourself out.”

            “Oh,” Castiel took his items to his room.

            It was still a little strange for Dean to think of Cass having his own room. Yet he wasn’t opposed to the idea. Cass was family after all. Dean didn’t know when he started to think of the angel as such. He just kind of realized it one day.

            After a second Dean followed Cass. The angel had laid everything out on his bed and was looking it all over. “You want help with anything?”

            “I don’t think so.” He picked up one of the unlined notebooks and a set of pens along with the tome. “Thank you Dean.”

            Dean smiled, “no problem.”

* * *

            Once Castiel started work on translating the tome he worked on it non-stop. Dean had to remind the angel to take a break and, “still need to sleep Cass.” There were times when Dean would physically pull the angel away to do something else. Though Dean was curious about what Castiel was working on in one of the notebooks. He refused to show Dean until he was done.

            While Cass was working on his own thing Dean decided to take some and work on his baby. The Impala needed her spark plugs changed along with a few other minor things, like the oil. Though he might take a look at the rear brakes. The vehicle stopped fine but there was something that just felt a little off. And if there was one thing Dean knew outside of hunting it was his baby.

            Bobby was working the phone lines. With the Apocalypse looming over them Hunters around the world were busy. It didn’t seem like anyone was going to get a break anytime soon.

            Speaking of breaks, he hadn’t seen Cass in a few hours. He was probably still holed up in his room working on that tome. Dean headed up and found the angel sitting on the bed, legs folded under him with the tome, notebooks and writing utensils laid out around him. The amount of concentration he was giving whatever part he was working on seemed intense.

            Dean leant against the door frame. “Hey Cass.”

            Castiel jumped, startled out of what he was doing. “Dean?”

            Dean smiled, “Dude, relax. I just came to see if you wanted to take a break.”

            Castiel picked up a blue colored pencil. “I am nearly done with this,” he replied.

            “You finished translating that thing already?”

            “No, this is something different.”

            That intrigued Dean. “What is it?”

            Castiel pulled the notebook to his chest, keeping the page from Dean’s view. “I will show you when I am finished.”

            “Okay. Just come downstairs in a few okay. You can’t stay up here all the time.” Dean watched Castiel nod and continue with his work. With a shake of his head Dean went back downstairs. Maybe Bobby needed help with something.

* * *

            Long after the sun had set and the moon shone bright in the sky did Castiel venture out of his room. Dean was sitting on the front steps, cold beer in hand. He turned when he heard the door open. Cass had one of his notebooks clutched tightly in his hands. He looked nervous.

            “What’s up Cass?”

            For a moment Castiel’s eyes darted upwards before he moved to sit beside Dean. Apparently he realized Dean didn’t actually want to know what was above them.

            The angel played with a corner of the book, looking more nervous than he had seconds before. “I… finished it Dean. Not the tome but…” He opened the notebook and handed it silently to the hunter.

            Confused and more than a little curious Dean took the notebook and looked at the page Castiel had opened to. It was a drawing of an angel sitting on a bolder but it was not at all like Dean was used to.

            Large black wings rose from the figure’s back. Dean guessed the wingspan would be double the figure’s height. A head of dark hair framed a young face where a hint of stubble dusted the figure’s face. There was a hint of a tan to the skin, like the person spent just enough time in the sun for color but not so long as to look like they went to a tanning booth all the time.

            The angel was lean in build. Dean could see that under the slightly too large sleeveless cream colored shirt. Well-toned legs were encased in black pants with what looked like black knee high boots.

            Dean’s gaze turned back to the face. The most striking feature was the figure’s _blue_ eyes. That was when Dean realized, “Holy shit Cass, is this you?”

            Castiel nodded, his cheeks taking on a slightly pink hue. “Yes, though a slightly younger version of myself.”

            “Is this what Jimmy looked like as a teen?” Dean remembered Castiel saying that Jimmy was his true vessel and the two looked alike.

            Again, Castiel shook his head, “No, he was thinner.”

            Dean looked back at the picture. It wasn’t just that this was the closest he was ever going to get to seeing Castiel’s true form, especially if he didn’t want his eyes burned out, Cass could draw. It was so lifelike it was like his friend had imprinted himself on the page.

            “Cass this is… amazing.” His eyebrows drew together in confusion. “I thought angel’s hat white wings.”

            “The color of our wings varies, much like a human’s hair color.”

            “But what about the whole…” Dean gestured vaguely with his hands, “genderless thing.”

            “We are genderless in that we can be both male and female.” He finally turned his head to look at Dean. “I have had female vessels Dean but that is always the form I return to.”

            Dean continued to examine the picture, taking in every detail his friend had put down and committing it to memory while also comparing it to the Castiel sitting next to him. The only difference Dean could see, besides the obvious wings, was his physical age. The Castiel in the drawing could have been in his twenties while he knew Jimmy was maybe a year or two older than he was.

            “This is awesome Cass. Thanks for showing me.”

            The angel’s mood seemed to brighten. “You’re welcome Dean.”


End file.
